2017 2016 2015 2014 2013 2012 2011 2010 2009 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999 1998 1997 1996 1995 1994 1993 1992 1991 1990 1989 1988 1987 1986 1985 1984 1983 1982 1981 1980 1979 1978
1st April 2017
Watch this, Garfield. - I'm going to scurry across the table! You do that. - Wheeeeee! Mice are odd.
2nd April 2017
Well, here we are... - Thank you for a wonderful evening, Jon. It was wonderful, wasn't it, Liz? - KISSSSSSSSS - SMOOOOOOOOCH - KISS KISS KISS KISS KISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS - click click click click click SMOOOOOOO- - GARFIELD! STOP WITH tHE PORCH LIGHT! click click click click Break it up out there, hot lips!
3rd April 2017
* RING - * RING Hmmm... - * RING I've forgotten how to use that thing. And time marches on.
4th April 2017
- - What's that noise? The ancient greeks called it a dial tone, you idgit.
5th April 2017
Garfield, why do we still have that thing? - I vaguely recall that it did have a purpose? It did. - Single women used it to shoot you down.
6th April 2017
- - The camera on this thing doesn't work! Pity him.
7th April 2017
Poor, neglected landline. Sigh... - Don'r worry, I haven't forgotten you. Thanks. - Remember all those pizzas we ordered together? Good times...good times.
8th April 2017
I don't use the old landline anymore. - Now it's just a conversation piece. - Wasn't that its original function?
9th April 2017
Hmmmm - A quiet house... - An empty couch... - A great old movie on TV... - And a perfectly fluffed pillow. - I swear... - Some days just have "waste me" written all over them!
10th April 2017
We should paint the house this spring. - That's a good idea. - Unless, of course, in some bizarre manner the term "we" implies the inclusion of me.
11th April 2017
Hey! - You almost stepped on me, creep! Oh, sorry. - STOMP! How about it now?
12th April 2017
Where have you been? I was worried about you. - I was abducted by aliens. - Really?! Now I'M worried about YOU.
13th April 2017
Nothing exciting happes around here. - - That is NOT exciting. That's about all I have to work with.
14th April 2017
Now I just touch the thingy on the screen, right? Yes. - Okay, everybody say "cheese"! Urf. Cheese! Meow. - CLICK!
15th April 2017
Bees are social insects. - - It's fun hanging out. No, it's not.
16th April 2017
- You know, Garfield, Jon and I have been seeing each other for a while now... I won't hold that against you. - And during that time I think he's really grown as a person. As opposed to a platypus? - I mean, when we were first dating he used to embarrass me on a almost-daily basis. Really? Not hourly? - It's nice to see how much he's matured since then. Poor Liz. Poor, naive liz. - I'll be out on the front lawn performing my interpretative dance to Mister Spring. - THUD You were saying?
17th April 2017
Wow... - Look at the grass grow. - I love action.
18th April 2017
Where did you go, tree? - I'm on vacation. - Vacation? I'm a surfboard on Maui.
19th April 2017
- PUNT - The classics are always in style.
20th April 2017
I'm cooking dinner! - Yah! I'm burning dinner! - I'm ordering pizza. You should cook more often.
21st April 2017
Remember the time I got stuck in a trash can? I sure do! - That was so... - Tragic...so tragic.
22nd April 2017
Hee-hee. I'm going to use a dog whistle to call a bunch of mutts to pester Jon. - SSSSSSSSSS - Oops. This must be my snake whistle.
23rd April 2017
24th April 2017