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Garfield on 1st August 2003
1st August 2003

Tell me, Maureen, do you hate me more than you used to? The same? I call that progress! You da man!

Garfield on 2nd August 2003
2nd August 2003

don't believe it! Garfield only ate half of his food! I took a break for a snack. Oh.

Garfield on 3rd August 2003
3rd August 2003

You know, I'm a do-nothin' kinda guy. But, I do nothin' very well. I fact, I'm the dean of do-nothin'! A LEAN, MEAN, DO-NOTHIN' MACHINE! How you doing? Feeling vital, thank you!

Garfield on 4th August 2003
4th August 2003

Dark shirt. Cat. Tah daaah.

Garfield on 5th August 2003
5th August 2003

I', going to vacuum this cat hair off the rug. Think, Jon! If you left the cat hair, we wouldn't NEED a rug!

Garfield on 6th August 2003
6th August 2003

Sometimes it's good to count your blessings. Cat hair is NOT a blessing. Well, it comes in handy if you're a cat.

Garfield on 7th August 2003
7th August 2003

A cat hair! I thought you were DONE shedding! So did I. Ah, it's the spare.

Garfield on 8th August 2003
8th August 2003

If I see ONE more cat hair around here, I'm going to LOSE it. poink YAAAAHH! Definitely worth the price of admission.

Garfield on 9th August 2003
9th August 2003

My life has no meaning. You know...when you don't move, you shed less. What was I thinking?

Garfield on 10th August 2003
10th August 2003

? Open your mouth, dummy. There it is, dummy. SLURP!

Garfield on 11th August 2003
11th August 2003

Do snails do ANYthing fast? No.

Garfield on 12th August 2003
12th August 2003

* RING...RING... That'll be mom. I'd better take it... * RING She's calling long distance. Where does she live? * RING Behind that shrub over there.

Garfield on 13th August 2003
13th August 2003

rub rub rub rub rub That was very affectionate, Garfield. I had peanut butter on my hands.

Garfield on 14th August 2003
14th August 2003

My sock puppet is in the wash. Sydney shoe just isn't the same. My foot is cold.

Garfield on 15th August 2003
15th August 2003

I've been all over the world! Which is no big deal... I can see the edge of it from here.

Garfield on 16th August 2003
16th August 2003

Ah... What a beautiful day! It's raining. Not in the kitchen.

Garfield on 17th August 2003
17th August 2003

Well, look at you! That's quite a smile! It's nice to see you in a good mood for a change. I SAT ON A MOUSETRAP.

Garfield on 18th August 2003
18th August 2003

As time passes, you get fatter and fatter. Ah yes, the age-old dilemma, Jon. How to stop time.

Garfield on 19th August 2003
19th August 2003

Sniff...it's lonely being a scale. Nobody listens to me. I'll listen. You're about eleven pounds shy of a big rig! I walked right into that one.

Garfield on 20th August 2003
20th August 2003

You're fat. Fat? Really fat... Really fat? Really, really fat. Oh! Really, really fat. I knew that.

Garfield on 21st August 2003
21st August 2003

Wow! Congratulations! On what? You are now officially prohibited from crossing some bridges.

Garfield on 22nd August 2003
22nd August 2003

You're fat. How about now? You may LOOK smaller, but you're still fat!

Garfield on 23rd August 2003
23rd August 2003

Just once I'd like to hear something nice form you. Oh, how wonderful it would be to soar through the sky like an eagle, so proud and free. I mean about me. You'd never get off the ground.

Garfield on 24th August 2003
24th August 2003

Garfield on 25th August 2003
25th August 2003

Been climbing trees? I know, diet time.

Garfield on 26th August 2003
26th August 2003

You may have an entire grape for a snack! HOW ABOUT A DROP OF WATER TO WASH IT DOWN?!

Garfield on 27th August 2003
27th August 2003

I'm only having ONE meatball.

Garfield on 28th August 2003
28th August 2003

I like celery. Oh, me too! That's why I've dressed this stalk up in its own little outfit! You're supposed to eat it. CANNIBAL!

Garfield on 29th August 2003
29th August 2003

"Cheeesecaaake". I was right! What? You just gained a pund.

Garfield on 30th August 2003
30th August 2003

I'm off my diet. I'm on my diet. I'm off my diet.

Garfield on 31st August 2003
31st August 2003

BURP * Teddy bears are like keys...they're always in the first place you think they'd be, and the last place you look.

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