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Garfield on 1st May 2000
1st May 2000

This was my great uncle Norbert. - He was a color-blind electrician. - He had more trouble with those read and black wires. Interesting hair style.

Garfield on 2nd May 2000
2nd May 2000

There's my great uncle Floyd. He drove a dynamite truck. - And there he is again... - and there, and there, and there...

Garfield on 3rd May 2000
3rd May 2000

This is a picture of "Scraps," our neighbor's dog on the farm. - Boy, he loved to play fetch. - Then, one day he chased a stick right into a thresher. At least he lived up to his name.

Garfield on 4th May 2000
4th May 2000

...and here's good old uncle Buford, a lifelong bachelor. - I never could figure out why. - Maybe it was that third arm... Couldn't exactly shop off of the rack, could he?

Garfield on 5th May 2000
5th May 2000

...and there's cousin leonard. - He believed he'd been kidnapped by aliens. - The aliens, of course, denied the whole thing. - Okay, NOW I'm frigthened. Are you frigthened?

Garfield on 6th May 2000
6th May 2000

There's old uncle Enos... - He was the state champion apple corer. - He had three medals. And six fingers too, I see.

Garfield on 7th May 2000
7th May 2000

- - Mister big shot! - Not so high and mighty without your newspaper, are you?! - Well, now the advantage is MINE! Ha ha ha ha ha!! - FLINK - Z I loathe you.

Garfield on 8th May 2000
8th May 2000

ATTENTION, THERE! - I HAVE tHE BEAR! - COME OUT OF THE BED NOW! You'll never take me awake!

Garfield on 9th May 2000
9th May 2000

When you're overweight, you have questions... - How is my energy?... How is my health?... - Am I wearing loafers?

Garfield on 10th May 2000
10th May 2000

I taught Odie a new trick! - Who broke this vase?! - Take the rap, Odie! Take the rap!

Garfield on 11th May 2000
11th May 2000

Thanks, doctor. - GARFIELD, THAT WAS THE VET'S OFFICE! - YOU HAVE A FUNGUS! Great! Say it a little louder, why don't you?!

Garfield on 12th May 2000
12th May 2000

No one has ever regretted going out with me, Gina. - Well, maybe they got a little upset. - All right! They changed their names and moved! But no regrets.

Garfield on 13th May 2000
13th May 2000

Always stretch before you exercise. - Got it. - Never stretch.

Garfield on 14th May 2000
14th May 2000

- Nobody understands me! - Not you! - And not you! - Oh, maybe my sock puppet understands me a LITTLE... - But not YOU guys! - And that's a good thing, right, Odie?

Garfield on 15th May 2000
15th May 2000

Jon's doing a little home improvement today. * TWANG - - He's just attempting to adjust his recliner. CRASH!

Garfield on 16th May 2000
16th May 2000

Welcome, you're just within time! Jon is screwing in a light bulb. screw screw screw KLUNK! - screw screw screw KLUNK! - Darn! Clockwise, brain boy!

Garfield on 17th May 2000
17th May 2000

Welcome back. Today, Jon is... - - -replacing a washer in the kitchen faucet. ABANDON HOUSE!!

Garfield on 18th May 2000
18th May 2000

Hey! A chocolate donut! - POW! - Hey! Where's my inner tube?!

Garfield on 19th May 2000
19th May 2000

Friday night: - - I bet the ringer is busted. Right sure, yeah, we'll run with that.

Garfield on 20th May 2000
20th May 2000

whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr - BLEEEAACCKKK YACK ACK ACK ACK G-G-G-G-GACK - Stupid blender! Aw, that was your best necktie, too.

Garfield on 21st May 2000
21st May 2000

* riiing - * riiing Hello? - Yes, Mrs. Feeny? ...your little dog? ...collar taken? ...shaved bald? ...painted green? ---uh-huh? Yeesh. - No, he's been here asleep all day. Yes, all day, really, uh-huh...goodbye. - - - *

Garfield on 22nd May 2000
22nd May 2000

So, Garfield. - How's the laziness business? - Slow.

Garfield on 23rd May 2000
23rd May 2000

Cats and mice are SUPPOSED to be enemies! - Fascinating. - Merits discussion. Cheese? My place.

Garfield on 24th May 2000
24th May 2000

I'm tired of looking at that face of yours, Odie. - - Cool! Now do a hamster!

Garfield on 25th May 2000
25th May 2000

- AAA! AAA! - LEG CRAMP! LEG CRAMP! It's always about YOU, isn't it?

Garfield on 26th May 2000
26th May 2000

** DING-DONG - Are you Jon's date? - ...stamp your foot once for yes and twice for no.

Garfield on 27th May 2000
27th May 2000

- - SIGH

Garfield on 28th May 2000
28th May 2000

- - Garfield, I feel that life is passing us by. - - - - Passing us by...heck, it's lapped us.

Garfield on 29th May 2000
29th May 2000

...and what do we have for the runners-up, Bob? - We have a lovely parting gift for each of them Chuck... - One-way tickets to LOSERville! At last, an honest game show.

Garfield on 30th May 2000
30th May 2000

Welcome to the All-Opera Channel. click - Welcome to "Great Works of Literature". click - Welcome to "Professional Monkey Wrestling". At last!

Garfield on 31st May 2000
31st May 2000

Woof! Woof! - Woof! Woof! - Woof! Woob! CUT! Real dumb.

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