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Garfield on 1st March 2000
1st March 2000

I'm using a new shampoo. As what?

Garfield on 2nd March 2000
2nd March 2000

Good morning, Garfield. Go away! Special day today! I said, "go away". It's "Check your-pet-for-parasites day"! I know a lawyer!

Garfield on 3rd March 2000
3rd March 2000

It's friday night, Garfield. Another weekend of TV and junk food... Falling asleep during some mindless movie... Yesss!

Garfield on 4th March 2000
4th March 2000

YAWN For those of you who came in late, here's what you missed. YAWN

Garfield on 5th March 2000
5th March 2000

Dinner! Soup? Soup?! SOUP?!! It's cream of lasagna. Souuuuuuuup.

Garfield on 6th March 2000
6th March 2000

skitter skitter skitter . STOMP! What's the point of having all these legs if I can't outrun anybody?

Garfield on 7th March 2000
7th March 2000

Dwayne, look at you! What happened?! SMACK That.

Garfield on 8th March 2000
8th March 2000

I have 342 kids...all teenagers. WHACK! Thank you. Any time.

Garfield on 9th March 2000
9th March 2000

A hobo spider...now I've seen everything. Buddy, can you spare a fly? Now I've HEARD everything, too.

Garfield on 10th March 2000
10th March 2000

My, my, my, that's a big hammer. You must be a construction worker. Salt of the earth, that's what. Now for the ironic twist.

Garfield on 11th March 2000
11th March 2000

Funny, I don't remember swatting a spider.

Garfield on 12th March 2000
12th March 2000

I'll see you then! I have a date every night this week! Because the women, they love me! They say everyone in the world has a double somewhere. Jon!

Garfield on 13th March 2000
13th March 2000

Well, I have something to do. Go ahead. I think I can handle this by myself.

Garfield on 14th March 2000
14th March 2000

"...and while the dog slept, the cat sat at the whetstone sharpening his claws." "Tonight would be an eventful night indeed..." To be continued... -

Garfield on 15th March 2000
15th March 2000

Staring at me doesn't bother me at all. SO STOP IT!

Garfield on 16th March 2000
16th March 2000

Here's a good cause, Garfield. I might look into this. All right! It's an endangered species list. Oh, it's not a menu?

Garfield on 17th March 2000
17th March 2000

I have a date, and the only thing clean is my gorilla suit. YEAAAAH! He never fails to disappoint me.

Garfield on 18th March 2000
18th March 2000

I hate to admit it, but I miss Jon. I miss the laughter...the kindness... THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!Maybe I should let him out the closet.

Garfield on 19th March 2000
19th March 2000

Garfield on 20th March 2000
20th March 2000

Here you go, hot from the grill! My omelette has feathers. Swap you for the one with a beak.

Garfield on 21st March 2000
21st March 2000

Two tuna specials, please. Sob! ...sorry, I get emotional. My first husband passed away while eating the tuna special. Cheese! I'll have a grilled cheese!

Garfield on 22nd March 2000
22nd March 2000

This cheeseburger is delicious, Irma! What's your secret? We let our cheese age, hon. Been sitting in my pickup for almost six months now. Spit take on three...

Garfield on 23rd March 2000
23rd March 2000

How's my lobster dinner coming? *SNAP* *SNAP* YAAHH! BY DOES! IT'S GOT BY DOSE! It'll be right up. ...with one interesting garnish.

Garfield on 24th March 2000
24th March 2000

Would you care for an after-dinner coffee drink? Sure! What have you got? Well, there's your regular and your decaf. You've gotta love your diner.

Garfield on 25th March 2000
25th March 2000

Nothing going on over there. Nothing going on over there. This must be where the action is.

Garfield on 26th March 2000
26th March 2000

I'm terribly sorry... That was Mrs. Feeny complaining about you again. You are NOT to set foot on her property again, understand?! * RING GET YOUR *TOE* OFF HER LAWN!!

Garfield on 27th March 2000
27th March 2000

I could use some cheering up. No way, Jose. I'm not leaving.

Garfield on 28th March 2000
28th March 2000

You're a lazy bum, Odie! I like to give him a little praise when he deserves it.

Garfield on 29th March 2000
29th March 2000

Harold, I'm afraid! Fear not, Harriet. I shall defend you to the end! GULP Well, my job is done.

Garfield on 30th March 2000
30th March 2000

I'm thinking of a number between one and ten. pat pat pat Good for you.

Garfield on 31st March 2000
31st March 2000

I have a date tonight! I wonder what I should give her? How about a head start?

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