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Garfield on 1st December 2000
1st December 2000

Hello, Grandma? This is Jon. Well, I'm a little sad. I can't seem to get a date. She says that's because I'm a dork. I'm sure she meant it in the best possible way.

Garfield on 2nd December 2000
2nd December 2000

You don't remember me, Becky? No? All right! Really? Ask her out!

Garfield on 3rd December 2000
3rd December 2000

SLUP Well, Garfield... The holidays are coming up... And it's quiet here... Too quiet... WAAAY to quiet... Maybe I should sing... HARRUMPH MEOW! MEOW! MEOW! slap slap slap slap bam bam bam bam

Garfield on 4th December 2000
4th December 2000

I wonder if Garfield knows Christmas is coming soon. HUG He knows.

Garfield on 5th December 2000
5th December 2000

Snow always makes it feel more christmasy... Well, fah lah, lah lah lah...

Garfield on 6th December 2000
6th December 2000

What is that snowman doing in the living room? Melting.

Garfield on 7th December 2000
7th December 2000

Jon's decorating the Christmas tree. ZZT Frayed extension cord. That ain't all that's frayed, pal.

Garfield on 8th December 2000
8th December 2000

SMACK Got a nifty tree topper. Go away!

Garfield on 9th December 2000
9th December 2000

Just remember: Santa is WATCHING you. Here's to you, big guy!

Garfield on 10th December 2000
10th December 2000

WHUMP! WHUMP! ? WHUMP! Just testing. Needs more lard.

Garfield on 11th December 2000
11th December 2000

I remember christmases when I was growing up... ...dad carving the roast fly... ...the yule gnat burning in the fireplace... You're putting me off my eggnog here.

Garfield on 12th December 2000
12th December 2000

I remember back on the farm, we had an electric toy train that ran around the Christmas tree. Then one year Doc Boy licked the track. He glowed for three days. I take back everything I said about him no being very bright.

Garfield on 13th December 2000
13th December 2000

Behold: the candy cane... A holiday icon...sleek...dazzling in its simplicity. And too darn tasty to pontificate on any longer.

Garfield on 14th December 2000
14th December 2000

Haaaaahhhh Mmmmmm Candy cane breath.

Garfield on 15th December 2000
15th December 2000

Let's make a deal... You tell me where you've hidden my Christmas present... And I won't rip your lips off and throw them on the roof. I don't like that look.

Garfield on 16th December 2000
16th December 2000

...so what would you say to Santa if he looked you straight in the eye and asked, "have you been GOOD this year?" Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr That's a kitty cat cop-out. So what? I'm desperate.

Garfield on 17th December 2000
17th December 2000

Gad... I can't take much more of this... The waiting... The not knowing... How is ANYone supposed to stand this kind of suspense. For...for... Eight more days. EIGHT MORE DAYS?!!

Garfield on 18th December 2000
18th December 2000

slam! IT WAS HORRIBLE! I BARELY ESCAPED WITH MY LIFE!! Christmas shopping at the mall.

Garfield on 19th December 2000
19th December 2000

Garfield! That was the shopping mall calling! Santa's elf wants his booties back. The crybaby.

Garfield on 20th December 2000
20th December 2000

Look what came, Garfield...a Christmas package from my mom! Okay, I'm going to cut the string... Careful...don't spill the gravy.

Garfield on 21st December 2000
21st December 2000

Have you been climbing the Christmas tree? Not ours. ** DING DONG Cover for me.

Garfield on 22nd December 2000
22nd December 2000

Sigh...what great Christmas memories... But, you know, we shouldn't live in the past... I certainly don't. I live for the PRESENT!

Garfield on 23rd December 2000
23rd December 2000

I'm very sorry, Mrs. Feeny. Happy holidays to you. She says you left a present on her doormat. 'tis the season for giving. A hairball?!! I made it myself.

Garfield on 24th December 2000
24th December 2000

pant pant pant pant pant pant squeak squeak squeak -

Garfield on 25th December 2000
25th December 2000

I love Christmas. So do I. And I love you, Garfield. So do I. And we all love you! Merry Christmas!

Garfield on 26th December 2000
26th December 2000

So long, Christmas! Good-bye! Don't be a stranger!

Garfield on 27th December 2000
27th December 2000

Hi, Denise, it's Jon! Are you doing anything for New Years's? I mean BESIDES avoiding me at all costs. Zing!

Garfield on 28th December 2000
28th December 2000

Nobody will go out with me on new year's. Don't feel bad, Jon. They wouldn't go out with you even if it weren't new year's. pat pat pat pat

Garfield on 29th December 2000
29th December 2000

WHY can't I get a date?! What am I? Ugly?...No! What am I? Impolite?...No! What a I? Boring?... Z OH, SHUT UP!

Garfield on 30th December 2000
30th December 2000

Dating is overrated. New year's overrated. Dates on new year's, however, are not. WAAAH!

Garfield on 31st December 2000
31st December 2000

Ten...nine... eight...seven... six...five... four...three... two...ONE... Garfield, it's seven in the morning... Practice makes perfect! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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